What If We Project Managed Family Law?

What If We Project Managed Family Law?

What If We Project Managed Family Law?

I have been feeling a little frustrated lately.

Not necessarily with anyone in particular (which is always a good start!), but with a process that I seem to find myself watching play out over and over again in family law matters. And the more I watch it, the more I keep thinking there has to be a better way.

It usually happens at the beginning of a matter.

The beginning of a family law matter is, almost by definition, messy. There are two people who have shared a life and who are now trying to work out how to untangle it. There are houses, mortgages, bank accounts, children, businesses, school arrangements, credit cards, investment properties, pets, furniture and all the other practical pieces of a life that don’t suddenly organise themselves neatly just because a relationship has ended.

Then, once lawyers are involved, we add another two humans to the mix. So now we have four people, all with different information, different priorities and often very different ideas about what needs to happen first.

And I think this is where things can start to go a little sideways.

Because really, the beginning of a family law matter is a planning phase. We are trying to understand the problem before we can solve it.

In a property matter, that usually means gathering information and documents so that we can build a balance sheet and understand the financial picture. We need to know what exists, what it’s worth, what is agreed, what isn’t agreed and what we simply don’t know yet. In parenting matters, the information might be different, but the process is much the same. What is happening now? What is working? What isn’t? What are the immediate problems? What information do we need before sensible longer-term decisions can be made?

None of that is particularly controversial.

The part I have been wondering about is how we do it.

 

The very slow conversation

Traditionally, once lawyers are involved, much of this early work happens through letters.

Now, I am a lawyer. I understand letters. I have written thousands of them and I am certainly not suggesting we should never write another one. But increasingly I find myself looking at some of the correspondence that happens in the early stages of family law matters and thinking:

This is actually just a conversation.

Except it is a conversation being conducted in possibly the slowest and most expensive way imaginable.

I had a matter cross my desk today that is a perfect example.

There is an investment property. There is rental income coming in. There are expenses going out. And right now, while the bigger property settlement is being worked through, someone needs to receive the rent and someone needs to pay the mortgage, utilities and other expenses.

It is a practical problem that needs a practical answer.

But once we put that question into the traditional family law process, it can become something much bigger. One lawyer writes to the other lawyer. That lawyer sends the letter to their client. The client considers it and provides instructions. The lawyer responds. The response raises another question, so that goes back to the first lawyer, who sends it to their client, who provides more instructions…

And before we know it, two or three weeks have passed and we may still not actually know who is paying the electricity bill.

Meanwhile, both clients have paid for all of those letters.

This is the part I am finding increasingly difficult to reconcile.

Because the letters themselves aren’t necessarily bad. The lawyers aren’t necessarily doing anything wrong. Everyone is working within a system that has developed over a very long time.

But I keep wondering whether we are sometimes using the wrong tool for the job.

Because there are actually four different projects happening

When a family law matter begins, the two clients are rarely moving at the same speed.

One person might have been thinking about separation for two years and has spreadsheets, bank statements and a very firm view about what should happen next. The other might still be trying to understand how their life changed so dramatically last Tuesday.

One might be focused entirely on money. The other might be worried about the children.

Then we add the lawyers, who also have their own tasks and priorities. One might be trying to get the disclosure together while the other is focused on resolving an urgent parenting arrangement.

So although we talk about “the matter” as though it is one thing moving neatly along a path, in reality there are multiple humans moving at different speeds, with different information and different priorities.

And perhaps this is why I have started thinking about family law less as a sequence of legal steps and more as a project management problem.

If this were any other complicated project, we would probably start by working out what needs to happen now, what information we need, who is responsible for getting it, what can wait and when everyone is coming back together to make the next set of decisions.

We would break the giant problem into smaller pieces.

But in family law, we have a tendency to keep the whole giant problem alive at once, often through correspondence, until eventually we reach the point where everyone decides it is time to mediate.

And I wonder whether we’ve got that bit backwards.

Perhaps mediation doesn't need to be the grand finale

I love collaborative practice because, among many other things, it solves this particular problem really well.

Instead of spending weeks writing backwards and forwards, we get the clients and their professional team together and talk. We work out what we know, what we don’t know, what needs to happen next and who is going to do it. Then everyone leaves the meeting with a plan.

But I also live in the real world of family law practice, and I know that most matters aren’t collaborative matters. Not every client wants to use the collaborative process, not every matter suits it and not every practitioner is interested in working that way.

So lately I have been wondering whether we can take one of the things that collaborative practice does so well and use it in ordinary family law matters.

And I think we can.

Through mediation.

Not necessarily the traditional “everyone arrive at 9am and nobody leaves until we have a settlement” mediation, but shorter, staged mediations used throughout the matter to actually manage the project.

Imagine, for example, that early in a property matter we scheduled a two or three hour mediation.

We aren’t there to settle the property matter. In fact, we might be nowhere near ready to do that.

We are there to sort out what needs sorting out now.

In the matter I mentioned earlier, that might mean deciding who receives the rental income, who pays the mortgage and expenses, what happens if there is a shortfall or surplus, and whether there are any other immediate financial issues that need an interim arrangement.

Then we could turn to what information is missing. Perhaps we need bank statements, tax returns, superannuation information or a valuation. We can agree who is getting what, by when, and what will happen once it arrives.

And then — this is the really important bit — we set the next date.

Everyone leaves knowing what they are supposed to do and when they are coming back.

To me, that feels enormously different from sending another letter and waiting to see what happens.

Then we do it again

Perhaps four or six weeks later, we have mediation number two.

By then, the immediate problems have hopefully been dealt with. The information has been gathered. We know more than we did the first time.

So now we can ask: where are we up to?

Maybe the balance sheet is almost agreed but there are three values still in dispute. Great. What do we need to resolve those?

Maybe we need a property valuation. Who is going to arrange it? Which valuer are we using? What instructions are they receiving? Who is paying the fee?

Maybe we have enough information to start talking about settlement or perhaps we don’t.  Either way, we make the next set of decisions and move the project forward.

Then, if we need it, we have mediation number three.

And perhaps that one is the mediation where we can actually resolve everything.

But if it isn’t, I don’t think that means the process has failed.

That is probably the part of this idea that I feel most strongly about.

We have developed a strange idea in family law that mediation is successful if the matter settles and unsuccessful if it doesn’t.

But if two or three shorter mediations mean that the clients have sorted out their immediate financial arrangements, completed disclosure, agreed most of their balance sheet, obtained the valuations they need and narrowed the real dispute down to two or three issues, surely that is success too?

Particularly if the alternative was three months of letters trying to achieve the same thing.

There is a cost to not knowing what happens next

Of course there is an obvious financial argument here. Letters cost money. Instructions cost money. Reviewing responses costs money. Going backwards and forwards over the same issue costs money.

But I think the bigger benefit might actually be the reduction in uncertainty.

One of the hardest things about separation is that suddenly almost everything feels uncertain.

Where am I going to live? What happens with the children? Can I afford to keep the house? What will my financial future look like? How long will this take? How much will it cost?

Then we put people into a legal process where they often don’t know what happens next either.

They receive a letter. They respond. They wait. Another letter arrives. There are more questions. They respond again. They wait again.

And at some point I think clients understandably start asking: When does this end?

To be fair, there are moments as a lawyer when I have looked at a file and wondered the same thing.

Which is why the project management idea keeps coming back to me.

Perhaps every family law matter needs a really simple framework:

Now. Next. Later.

What needs to be dealt with now?

What do we need to do next?

And what can sensibly wait until later?

Not everything needs to be solved today.

But everyone should probably know what they are doing next.

Maybe we just need more conversations

I don’t think this is revolutionary.

And I certainly don’t think it means we throw out correspondence, traditional negotiation or any of the other tools we use every day in family law. There will always be things that need to be recorded in writing. There will always be matters that need detailed legal argument. And there will, unfortunately, always be matters that need the Court.

But there are also a lot of things that just need a conversation.

A structured conversation, with the clients there, their lawyers there and someone helping everyone stay focused on the decisions that actually need to be made.

Maybe that happens twice.

Maybe it happens three times.

Maybe after all of that we still don’t have a settlement and we need to take another path.

But at least we have been deliberately moving the matter forward rather than allowing it to meander through correspondence without any real sense of where the next milestone sits.

And perhaps that is the question I want us to start asking more often.

Not:

Are we ready for mediation?”

But:

Would getting everyone in a room for two hours move this matter forward?”

Because sometimes the answer might be no.

But increasingly, I suspect the answer is yes.

And if the choice is between that and another six letters about who is paying the electricity bill, I know which meeting I’d rather be in.

About the Author

Clarissa Rayward is an Accredited Specialist in Family Law and Director of Brisbane Family Law Centre. She is also the founder of Happy Lawyer Happy Life, where she works with lawyers across Australia to design practices that are sustainable, humane and commercially sound. Clarissa regularly presents on collaborative practice, lawyer wellbeing and innovative legal systems design.

The In-Between Steps | Small Improvements in Business

This is a birds eye view image of Clarissa and her daughter’s shoes.

The In-Between Steps

The In-Between Steps: Small improvements in business

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about tiny changes.

The sort of changes that barely feel worth mentioning when you make them. They’re certainly not the sort of thing you call a team meeting over and they’re definitely not the sort of thing that deserves a LinkedIn (humble) brag

And yet, the longer I’ve been in business, the more I think they’re the things that change everything.

These school holidays I’ve spent most of my time (and many late nights!) at dance competitions. Yep… full dance mum mode over here. And no, before anyone asks, it’s absolutely nothing like Dance Moms. It’s mostly theatre dressing rooms, hunting down decent coffee, navigating Dream Duffels the size of small cars and finding AB crystals stuck to your shoes for the next fortnight. #DanceMumLife

Anyway… dance and business. Stay with me because there is a connection. (Honestly, I didn’t think there was one either until I was driving home.)

My eldest daughter, London, is an incredible performer, but she’s certainly not on her own. The standard at her age is extraordinary. These kids can all do the tricks now. Five turns? No worries. Big leaps? Easy. Flexible enough to make my hamstrings hurt just watching them.

Somewhere over the weekend one of the judges made a comment that has been bouncing around in my head ever since.

She wasn’t talking about the tricks- at this level, she said, everyone can do the tricks. She was talking about the in-between steps. The moments where, to the audience, it almost looks like nothing is happening. Except that’s exactly where the routine is won. Not because of one spectacular leap, but because of everything that quietly connects one moment to the next.

As much as London probably doesn’t want to hear it… I think the judge is right. And I think business works exactly the same way.

It’s funny really because if you spend any time on LinkedIn (and yes… I appreciate the irony of writing this on LinkedIn) you’d think businesses are built on the tricks.

You know the sort of things I mean… the launch, the rebrand, the record revenue month, the shiny new office, the “We’ve finally cracked it!” moment.

They’re the sexy bits of business and don’t get me wrong… I love them too. I love dreaming up new ideas, new products and new events. If there’s a shiny idea floating around, there’s every chance I’ve already got a colour-coded notebook dedicated to it.

But I wonder if social media has accidentally convinced us that those are the things that build businesses simply because they’re the things worth photographing.

No one jumps onto LinkedIn to announce they’ve updated their new enquiry documents.

Can you imagine it?

"Big news everyone... we've completely rewritten our initial enquiry documents!"

Twenty-seven likes. Two sympathy comments. One person asking what font you used.

It’s probably not going viral. But maybe that’s because we’re all taking photos of the wrong things.

But those are the ‘in-between’ steps in business and much like those transitions in dance, they don’t look flashy at the time, but they are the actions that will win (or lose!) you in business. 

The longer I’ve been in business (18 years this year… which somehow feels both impossible and completely believable!) the more convinced I am that those tiny, boring, unglamorous decisions are where great businesses are built.

When I look back, I don’t see one giant leap. I see lots of little moments where I found myself thinking, “Hmm… that doesn’t feel right anymore.”  So we’d change it. We’d rewrite an email because it sounded too robotic. We’d rethink the way we answered the phone because I wanted people to feel calmer before they’d even walked through our door. I’d learn something new about neurodiversity and realise one question in our initial meeting needed to change. Tiny things, really. The sort of things you fix in between client meetings without giving them much thought. But enough of those tiny moments and, before you know it, you’ve built a business that feels completely different.

Years ago, my very clever friend Ben Deverson introduced me to the idea of improving by just 1%. I remember thinking at the time that one percent felt, well, almost pointless. Surely one percent can’t change anything? But that’s exactly the point. One percent today isn’t really about today. It’s about what happens when you keep finding another one percent tomorrow. One tiny improvement probably won’t change your business. Fifty of them absolutely will. Turns out Ben was onto something.

Looking back, I don’t actually think I’ve ever had one giant business breakthrough. I think I’ve just accidentally collected hundreds of tiny ones.

People often ask me how we moved away from timesheets and into fixed fees, as though there was one brave decision that changed everything.

There wasn’t. It was hundreds of tiny decisions- some worked and plenty didn’t but we’d try something, realise it wasn’t right and tweak it to try again.  And before we knew it we’d built something that looked completely different from where we’d started.  

The same thing is happening right now as we’ve been learning more about neurodiversity. A few years ago I would have spent a lot of time explaining our process and expecting clients to adapt to it.

Now we’re much more likely to begin with a different question.

"How would you like to work with us?"

It’s one sentence. One tiny change. But it completely changes the conversation because we’re no longer assuming we already know what someone needs.

In a world that’s racing towards AI and automation (and yes… before anyone asks… I absolutely love AI too!) I’m becoming more convinced that genuine human connection is only going to become more valuable. Maybe that’s another one percent improvement. Choosing connection over convenience whenever we can.

The same is true of leadership. I’ve never walked out of a team day thinking, “Well, culture’s sorted now. It doesn’t work like that.  Culture is built on the ordinary days.  It’s built on an ordinary Tuesday afternoon with a quiet thank you or noticing someone looks a bit flat and asking if they’re okay or finally having the conversation you’ve been putting off because everyone knows it needs to happen.

Those are the in-between steps too. Nobody claps for them. Nobody posts about them. But they’re often the very things that win… or lose… the performance.

So this week I’m not looking for the next giant leap. I’m looking for another one percent. Maybe that’s another email to improve, or a better question to ask a client. Maybe it’s finally simplifying that process everyone’s quietly working around. None of it is particularly glamorous.

And I think the dance judge was right. The audience remembers the spectacular leap but the dancer wins because of the in-between steps. But they’re often the very thing that wins… or loses… the routine.

And after eighteen years in business, I’m starting to think  we build great businesses exactly the same way.

So maybe this week don’t go looking for the spectacular leap and instead go looking for the in-between steps. I have a feeling that’s where the marks are.

So, could this be your next step?

We spend so much time looking for the breakthrough moment that we often overlook what really changes us.

The conversations.
The habits.
The tiny decisions we make again tomorrow.

That’s what The Reboot is all about. Not chasing the next shiny idea, but creating the space, support and accountability to keep taking the in-between steps that build a better business.

If this article felt a little like it was written for you, I’d love to keep the conversation going.

About the Author

Clarissa Rayward is an Accredited Specialist in Family Law and Director of Brisbane Family Law Centre. She is also the founder of Happy Lawyer Happy Life, where she works with lawyers across Australia to design practices that are sustainable, humane and commercially sound. Clarissa regularly presents on collaborative practice, lawyer wellbeing and innovative legal systems design.

Same Law, Different Lens: Adapting Legal Practice for Neurodiverse Thinking

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Same Law, Different Lens:
Adapting Legal Practice for Neurodiverse Thinking

Same Law, Different Lens: Adapting Legal Practice for Neurodiverse Thinking

The law is the same for everyone but the way clients experience it is not. For neurodiverse individuals, legal processes can feel overwhelming, confusing, or even inaccessible unless we, as practitioners, adapt our approach. 

Before we go any further, I want to be really clear about where I’m coming from in this conversation.  I am not a health professional and do not have clinical expertise in neurodiversity. Nor do I speak from the position of having any diagnosis myself.

What I do bring is over two decades of working closely with people in moments of high stress, vulnerability and change and a lived awareness of neurodiversity through my family, my colleagues, my friends, and my professional community.
I sit at the intersection of law, communication, mediation, and wellbeing and what I’ve learned is this:


The law may be the same for everyone, but the way people process and experience it is not.

This discussion is not about labels or pathology; it is about legal practice. In particular, it considers how legal systems, often unintentionally, create friction for certain thinking styles, and how small, thoughtful adjustments can make legal work clearer, calmer and more effective for everyone involved.

Who I am, and why this perspective matters

I am an accredited specialist family lawyer and the Director of Brisbane Family Law Centre, a multidisciplinary practice where lawyers work alongside counsellors and financial professionals. Much of my work involves supporting people who are overwhelmed, stressed and emotionally raw, often required to absorb complex legal information at precisely the moment their nervous system is least equipped to do so.

Alongside my legal practice, I am the founder of Happy Lawyer Happy Life, where I work with lawyers across Australia to build legal practices that are sustainable, humane and effective. That work grew directly out of my own experience in practice, and a growing recognition that when legal systems are not designed with humans in mind, it is the humans- clients and lawyers alike- who eventually burn out.

Outside of work, I am a mother of two, an enthusiastic consumer of coffee, a lover of colour, and a committed “bedazzler”—a term my family uses somewhat less generously to describe my crafting habits. I am also the author of Splitsville: How to separate, stay out of court and stay friends, a book focused on helping families navigate separation without losing their minds, or their relationships, in the process. The themes, as it turns out, are consistent.

Over many years of training lawyers across Legal Aid, private practice and community settings, one pattern has emerged repeatedly: lawyers care deeply about doing good work, but the systems they operate within do not always make that easy.
This article sits at the intersection of working with neurodiverse clients, supporting overwhelmed practitioners, and observing how small, intentional shifts in communication and structure can significantly reduce friction on both sides of the lawyer–client relationship.

I do not approach this topic as a clinician or an academic. I approach it as a lawyer who has learned, sometimes the hard way, that how we practise matters just as much as what the law says. If small changes can make legal processes clearer for clients, calmer for practitioners, and slightly less exhausting for everyone involved, that is a meaningful outcome.

With that in mind, this article explores neurodiversity not as a diagnosis, but as a lens through which to better understand how different people experience the same legal process in very different ways.

Neurodiversity: a shared language for legal practice

Before considering how neurodiversity shows up in legal practice, it helps to establish a shared language. Not for the purpose of labelling clients, but to better understand what someone might be experiencing when legal information is not landing as expected. Importantly, the language used in this context is descriptive rather than diagnostic. Lawyers do not need to be experts in neurodiversity; they simply need enough awareness to recognise when an adjustment in approach may be helpful.

The term neurotypical is commonly used to describe thinking styles that align with what most systems are designed around. These are the assumptions built into many legal processes: an ability to process verbal information quickly, hold multiple ideas in mind, infer meaning, and function under time pressure and ambiguity. This does not make neurotypical thinking better or preferable; it simply reflects what has traditionally been assumed.

Neurodiversity is a broader concept. It recognises that there is no single “normal” brain, but rather a natural variation in how humans think, learn, process information and respond to the world. In this sense, neurodiversity includes everyone. Difference is not a deficit; it is a feature of human systems, and systems that recognise this tend to function more effectively.

The term neurodivergent is often used to describe an individual whose thinking style differs from what is typically assumed in system design. It is not a medical diagnosis, but a descriptive or identity-based term. Some people strongly identify with it, while others do not use it at all. From a legal practice perspective, the label itself matters far less than the lived experience. Lawyers do not need to apply terminology; they need to notice how a client is responding to the process in front of them.

In practice, lawyers will encounter a wide range of terms, including ADHD, autism (and autism spectrum), dyslexia, dyspraxia, OCD, Tourette’s, and what is sometimes described as acquired neurodivergence arising from trauma or brain injury. These terms are not always used consistently. Some are clinical diagnoses, while others are older labels that people continue to use because that is how they were originally diagnosed. For example, Asperger’s is now generally considered part of the autism spectrum, yet many people still identify with the term. ADHD is better understood as a difference in attention regulation rather than a simple deficit, and trauma alone can significantly affect how information is processed, even without a lifelong diagnosis.

The most respectful and effective approach is a simple one: use the language your client uses, avoid correcting or relabelling, and focus on how the legal process is being experienced. When something feels hard for a client, it is worth paying attention to that experience, regardless of whether there is a name for it.

What matters in legal practice

In legal practice, the focus is not on diagnosis. Lawyers do not need a client to have a formal diagnosis, nor do they need to ask for one or apply labels. In many cases, clients will not have a diagnosis, may choose not to disclose one, or may not even be aware that neurodivergent thinking is part of their experience.

What matters instead is how the client is experiencing the legal process in front of them. If a process feels hard for a client, then it is hard for them regardless of whether there is a name for that experience. Legal practice is concerned with engagement, understanding and participation, not classification.

Why this shows up so often in Legal work

In Legal settings, clients rarely present with a single challenge in isolation. More commonly, practitioners are working with layered or stacked complexity: trauma or chronic stress combined with neurodivergent traits or diagnoses, alongside language or literacy barriers, cultural differences, and the pressure of urgent, high-stakes legal issues.

Each of these factors on its own may be manageable. Together, they can significantly increase cognitive and emotional load. When that happens, standard legal processes forms, timelines, dense explanations, procedural expectations can all feel overwhelming or even impossible to navigate. From this perspective, behaviour that appears disengaged, inconsistent or resistant is often better understood as overload rather than unwillingness.

Recognising layered complexity helps explain why otherwise capable clients may struggle to engage with legal processes, and why a purely procedural response is often insufficient.

A final reassurance

This is not about getting things perfect. Lawyers do not need to memorise terminology or attempt to identify who is neurodivergent and who is not. The work is simply about noticing when information is not landing, when someone appears overwhelmed, or when behaviour is being interpreted as “difficult” rather than “struggling”.

From there, the task is to adjust how legal practice is delivered not what the law requires. Small, thoughtful shifts in structure, communication and process can make a meaningful difference to how the law is experienced.

With that shared understanding in place, it becomes easier to see where legal processes most often trip clients up, even when the legal advice itself is sound.

Where clients get stuck: when the law is right, but the process isn’t working

It is often said that when matters stall or escalate, it is because a client is “difficult”, disengaged or resistant. In practice, the problem is frequently more subtle. Clients often become stuck not because the law is unclear, but because the way the legal process operates collides with layered complexity in ways that are hard to see in real time.

Consider the following composite example, drawn from practice. Identifying details have been altered, but the dynamics will be familiar to many working in family law.

Adam was involved in a family law matter and was, by most measures, an engaged and motivated client. He wanted to do the right thing and took his legal obligations seriously. He also lived with ADHD and anxiety and was receiving treatment for both. These aspects of his experience did not diminish his insight or intelligence, but they did shape how he processed information and interacted with the legal system.

From the outset, Adam communicated rapidly and in volume. Emails arrived in quick succession, often with multiple attachments. Messages were detailed, urgent and wide-ranging. Conversations moved quickly, with ideas stacking on top of one another. None of the information was trivial; all of it mattered to him.

As pressure increased, attempts to regain control intensified. In high-stress environments, when trust feels fragile, people seek control.  Not because they distrust their legal team, but because their nervous system is seeking safety. Rebuilding trust reduces the need for control.

The lawyer initially assisting Adam was capable, conscientious and committed to progressing the matter appropriately. She was also operating within a system that values efficiency, containment and linear communication. As the volume and pace of information increased, the interaction became increasingly difficult to manage. Adam felt key points were being missed. The practitioner felt under constant pressure to keep up. Each interaction left both parties more strained than the last.

Nothing in this dynamic reflected a lack of skill or effort. Rather, it highlighted how quickly pressure can build when a client’s communication style does not align with the structure the system expects, and when there is little room to adapt that structure.
The matter proceeded to mediation but did not resolve. During that mediation, however, something notable occurred. In the shared physical space of the room, Adam presented very differently. He was calm, considered and receptive. He took on advice, engaged thoughtfully with proposals, and was able to participate in the process in a way that had not been evident previously.
The contrast was striking. Until that point, nearly all interactions had occurred at a distance- by email, phone or online. The mediation environment, with its structure, containment and shared presence, appeared to support a level of regulation and focus that had been difficult to achieve through remote communication alone.

Hoping to avoid further escalation, Adam later attempted to manage communication with his former partner directly. That approach was unsuccessful. Financial pressure increased, communication deteriorated, and court proceedings followed.
As the matter progressed, additional complexity emerged. Financial arrangements were not as straightforward as they had initially appeared. Responsibilities were not being met. At the same time, Adam’s relationship with his children deteriorated, adding emotional strain to an already fragile situation. The cumulative weight of legal pressure, uncertainty and prolonged stress took a significant toll on his mental and physical health.

Adam returned to his lawyers for assistance. This time, the way the work was done changed.

The legal strategy remained the same, but the process was adjusted deliberately. Communication was narrowed and structured. Meetings were held by Zoom or in person rather than by phone alone. Adam expressed a strong preference for text and email, often followed by a short call, and that pattern was accommodated within clear boundaries.

Expectations around information were made explicit. When Adam provided large volumes of material, it was acknowledged, and he was told how it would be reviewed and translated into a format required for the legal process. Interactions were designed to reduce cognitive load rather than add to it.

Adam continued to use technology, to analyse and organise information in ways that worked for him. Others did not need to use those tools themselves; it was enough to recognise that they supported his thinking and engagement.

Over time, the change was visible. The matter progressed more steadily and achieved positive legal outcomes. More importantly, Adam’s engagement shifted. He was calmer. He trusted the process. He understood where boundaries sat and what would happen with the information he provided.

This case is not about a “difficult” client, nor about inadequate lawyering. It is about layered complexity colliding with systems that were not designed to flex. It underscores the value of thoughtful matching between clients and practitioners and suggests a broader lesson for legal practice: when matters are not working, adding pressure rarely helps. More often, what is required is greater structure- designed to reduce cognitive load, restore trust and support meaningful participation.

What this example highlights

Several practical lessons emerge from this example. Neurodivergent clients may communicate more, not less, particularly when they are anxious, invested or trying to ensure nothing important is missed. In these moments, overwhelm can easily be mistaken for disengagement or resistance, when it is more accurately understood as cognitive overload.

What may appear to a practitioner as over-communication or unnecessary urgency is often not a deficit but activation. When identity, safety or reputation feel under threat, a client living with ADHD is likely to intensify their attention. In those moments, the goal is not dominance or disruption — it is protection. Understanding this distinction changes how lawyers interpret intensity.

The example also underscores the importance of practitioner experience and wellbeing. Lawyer stress is not incidental; it shapes interactions, decision-making and outcomes. Flexibility in communication and process is not a lack of professionalism, but a considered response to complexity. Small, intentional adjustments—made early—can prevent escalation that later becomes far more difficult to manage.

These observations point to a broader conclusion: when matters are not progressing as expected, the answer is rarely to push harder. More often, it is to work differently.

With that in mind, the next section turns to what those small adjustments can look like in everyday legal practice- starting with language, structure and communication.

Practical adjustments that change everything

Why structure comes first

If there is one place to start when working with neurodiverse clients, it is structure. And really, everything I am about to say here, applies to all clients and all humans and is not unique to neurodiverse clients.   Not because people need control, but because predictability reduces cognitive load. When the brain is not working hard to anticipate what might happen next, it has more capacity to engage with the substance of the law.

Structure is also one of the most accessible tools available to lawyers. Many of the most effective adjustments require no additional resources, no formal approval and no change to legal obligations. They are simply refinements in how work is delivered.

Structure and predictability as a starting point​

Structure does not require rigid scripts or inflexible rules. It begins with making the shape of an interaction visible.

Simple practices can have a significant impact. Setting an agenda at the start of a meeting clearly stating what will be covered and in what order often helps clients settle. This can be done verbally, in writing, or visually. Knowing the outline of a conversation reduces anxiety and allows attention to shift to the content itself.

Time signposting plays a similar role. Briefly noting how long a meeting has been running, how much time remains, or when an important issue is about to be addressed can be grounding, particularly for clients who experience time blindness or heightened anxiety.

Explicit transitions also matter. Signalling when topics are changing, when a pause is being introduced, or when a question is being asked for information rather than judgment can prevent misinterpretation. What may feel abrupt to a practitioner can feel stabilising to a client who is struggling to track the flow of conversation.

Clear next steps are another key element of structure. Limiting this to one layer what happens next, who is responsible, and by when helps avoid the overwhelm that can come from multiple simultaneous tasks or loosely defined expectations.

Low-cost adjustments with high impact

Some structural supports take slightly more intention, but still no additional budget. Providing short written summaries after meetings using plain language and bullet points rather than dense prose can dramatically improve understanding and follow-through. These summaries do not need to be polished or exhaustive; clarity matters more than presentation.

Limiting choices is another powerful tool. While autonomy is important, too many options can be paralysing. Offering two or three clear pathways, alongside a professional recommendation, often supports decision-making more effectively than presenting every possible alternative.

Repetition, used intentionally, is also a form of structure. Repeating key points without apology, or restating them in a different way, reinforces understanding. Repetition in this context is not a failure of communication; it is a support.

Finally, building in permission to pause whether through short breaks, moments of silence, or explicitly deferring an issue prioritises regulation before resolution. Progress is rarely made when cognitive or emotional overload is left unaddressed.

Environment and process matter too

Structure is not limited to language or meetings; it also extends to environment and process. Small choices can make a difference, such as offering seating options, allowing movement, giving clients control over whether cameras are on or off, or normalising note-taking during discussions. Comfort supports cognition.

Where possible, greater consistency can further reduce cognitive load. Using consistent meeting formats, holding appointments at the same time or place, and maintaining continuity of practitioner all help build trust. Predictability often achieves more than rapport alone.

Structure through language

Language itself is a structural tool. Short sentences, one question at a time, and concrete rather than abstract phrasing all support comprehension. Explaining why a particular question is being asked can also reduce anxiety and resistance. When clients understand the purpose behind an inquiry, they are more likely to engage with it.

Flexibility within clear boundaries

Flexibility is often misunderstood as a lack of boundaries. In practice, the opposite is often true. Neurodiverse clients frequently do better when boundaries are explicit. Acknowledging information while clearly explaining how it will be used.  For example, confirming that material will be reviewed and translated into the format required for the legal process can contain communication without dismissing it.

Higher-investment options

Some adjustments require greater resources and will not be available in every setting. Access to quieter spaces, longer or staggered appointments, multidisciplinary support, consistent case allocation, or assistive technology can all be valuable where they are available. These are not expectations, but possibilities, and their absence does not prevent meaningful improvement through simpler measures.

A key reframe

These adjustments are not special accommodations or exceptions. They are refinements to practice that tend to benefit a wide range of people, including neurodiverse clients, traumatised clients, culturally diverse clients and stressed practitioners. Good structure helps everyone.

This is structured empathy – the deliberate design of communication and process to reduce unnecessary cognitive and emotional load. It is not soft practice. It is high-functioning practice.  And I have my client Adam to thank for that phrase.  It is how he describes the changes we made and I love it!  He framed it this way “Structured empathy is not soft practice. It is high-functioning practice.”

Once structure is in place, many other aspects of practice become easier. Communication improves, misunderstandings reduce, and advocacy and mediation are more effective. From here, attention can turn to how language and delivery choices can either calm or escalate an already pressured situation.

Language that reduces overwhelm: small shifts with outsized impact

Language is one of a lawyer’s primary tools. It is also one of the easiest ways to overload someone. For neurodiverse clients in particular, stress combined with dense or implicit language can mean that the message never fully arrives.

This is not about “dumbing things down”. It is about ensuring that information actually lands. The goal is understanding, not impression.

Core principles for supportive legal language

Language that supports understanding tends to share a few key features. It is clear rather than compressed, concrete rather than abstract, predictable rather than meandering, and explicit rather than implied. If a message feels repetitive to the lawyer delivering it, that is often a sign it is landing for the client receiving it.

One idea at a time

A simple but powerful shift is limiting each sentence to one idea. Legal training encourages us to compress information, but compression increases cognitive load.

For example, instead of saying:

“Given the history and the allegations, the court may take a cautious approach, which means we’ll need to consider interim arrangements while also preparing evidence.”

Breaking the information into smaller units can make a significant difference:

The court will likely be cautious.
 That means we need interim arrangements.
 We also need evidence.”

The substance does not change. The accessibility does.

One question at a time

Similarly, asking multiple questions at once can overwhelm clients who are already processing under stress. Separating questions and allowing space between them supports both comprehension and recall. Pausing is not wasted time; it is processing time.

Making the process visible

Meta-language- briefly saying what you are doing- can be grounding rather than disruptive. Statements such as “I’m going to pause you for a moment”, “This next question is important”, or “I’m changing topics now” provide predictability. Explicit transitions often reduce anxiety, particularly for clients who struggle to track conversational flow.

Making the implicit explicit

Lawyers rely heavily on implied meaning. Neurodiverse clients often do not.

Phrases such as “the court won’t look favourably on this” or “we need to be careful” can be vague or ambiguous. Making the underlying concern explicit supports understanding and reduces misinterpretation. For example, explaining that something is risky because it affects a child’s stability, or that a particular course of action carries a specific legal consequence, provides clarity where implication does not.

Explaining why

One of the most effective language shifts is explaining the purpose behind a question or request. Understanding why something matters reduces resistance and builds trust.

Statements such as “I’m asking this because it helps me assess safety” or “This matters because the judge will focus on it” give context to the task at hand. When clients understand the relevance of what is being asked of them, they are more likely to engage meaningfully with the process.

Repetition without apology

Many lawyers apologise when they repeat themselves. There is rarely a need to do so. Repetition is not patronising; it is supportive. Saying “I’m going to repeat the key point” signals intention and professionalism, not uncertainty.

Containing fast talkers and information floods

Many lawyers Some neurodiverse clients communicate by providing more information, not less. The goal is not to shut this down, but to contain it.

Phrases that acknowledge the information while setting boundaries such as “I’m going to stop you there so I can keep us on track”, or “I’ll take that and organise it into the format the court needs” can feel calming rather than dismissive. Containment often reduces anxiety because it reassures the client that nothing important is being ignored.

When I shared this article with Adam he said to me-

You would say, “I hear you. That’s hard.” There would be a pause, then, “What we need to focus on here is X, because Y.”

What you did, often without me explicitly asking, was regulate me. It preserved dignity.  It kept the work moving. Over time, I learned I could say, “Please keep me on track.  Stop me if I go down a hole. But check that you have captured the weight of what I am raising.”

Written language matters too

Written communication deserves the same attention as spoken language. Most clients read legal correspondence under stress. Dense paragraphs, unclear headings and multiple actions embedded in a single message can increase overwhelm.

Clear written communication tends to favour bullet points over blocks of text, headings that answer questions, key points placed at the top, and one action per section. Written does not need to be long; it needs to be clear.

Language that escalates and alternatives

Certain phrases are more likely to escalate tension, particularly when clients are already dysregulated. Statements such as “you need to…”, “that’s not relevant”, or “we’ve already covered this” can feel controlling or dismissive.

Alternatives that maintain boundaries while reducing escalation include “the next step is…”, “that’s less important right now, and here’s why”, or “let me summarise where we’re up to”. These shifts preserve authority while supporting regulation.

How information is delivered matters

Spoken and written language are not interchangeable. As lawyers, it is easy to assume that if something has been said clearly, it has been understood. For many neurodiverse clients, spoken information especially under stress is the hardest to process.

That does not mean written communication is always better. Written information that is dense or overly legalistic can also overwhelm. The question is not which mode is better, but which mode is better matched to the client and the moment.

Some clients need to hear information first and then read it. Others need to read it before talking it through. Many benefit from a combination: a spoken explanation followed by a short written summary.

Visual language as support

For some clients, words spoken or written remain too abstract. Visual supports can make a significant difference. Timelines, flowcharts, checklists, simple diagrams, one-page summaries and process maps help reduce cognitive load by showing relationships and sequence, rather than describing them.

Visual aids sit between language and process. They do not need to be sophisticated or professionally designed to be effective. Hand-drawn timelines, whiteboard explanations or shared notes can be more useful than polished brochures. Clarity matters more than presentation.

A simple rule of thumb

If a client continues to ask the same question, it is often a delivery issue rather than a comprehension issue. Changing how information is delivered is frequently faster and more effective than repeating what has already been said.

With structure and language in place, it becomes easier to consider how these principles apply in higher-pressure contexts such as advocacy, court and mediation—where stress, power dynamics and pace are heightened.

Designing for calm, not compliance

Environment and process tweaks that support regulation

Before turning to law, language or strategy, there is something more fundamental to consider: regulation. When a person’s nervous system is on high alert, their ability to process information, make decisions and engage meaningfully drops significantly. In those moments, environment often becomes the fastest way to signal safety.

This is not about creating a particular “look” or following design trends. It is about reducing sensory and psychological threat so that people have the capacity to engage with what is being asked of them. Calm is not a luxury in legal practice; it is a functional condition for understanding.

Environmental tweaks in practice

In my family law practice, a conscious decision was made to design client spaces to feel more like a home than a traditional office. The intention was not to soften the seriousness of the work, but to support regulation before legal discussions even began.

Desks were removed from between practitioners and clients, replaced with armchairs and softer furnishings. Gentle scent cues were introduced—nothing overpowering, simply enough to signal that this was a calm space rather than an adversarial one. The feedback was consistent: clients reported feeling calmer as soon as they walked in.

That calm did a great deal of work before a single legal issue was discussed. Conversations flowed more easily, emotions were better regulated, and clients were more able to absorb information. The environment itself had become part of the legal process.

Calm first. Law second.

This approach is not about aesthetics. It is about recognising that when a space feels safe, conversations become easier to hold. Reducing sensory overload and perceived threat allows attention to shift from self-protection to problem-solving.

Importantly, many effective environment adjustments cost nothing.

No-cost ways to support calm

Simple choices can restore a sense of control and reduce stress. Offering clients a choice of where to sit, sitting side-by-side rather than across a desk, or normalising movement during meetings can all help regulate nervous systems. Allowing note-taking, fidgeting or doodling can improve focus rather than detract from it. In online settings, flexibility around cameras being on or off can also make a meaningful difference.

Choice itself is regulating. When people feel they have some control over their physical experience, they are better able to engage cognitively.

Low-cost adjustments with high impact

Other adjustments require a small amount of intention rather than a large budget. Soft furnishings, plants or access to natural light where possible, neutral lighting that avoids glare, and simple scent cues can all contribute to a calmer environment. These are not indulgences; they are regulation tools.

When physical space can’t change

Many lawyers- particularly those working in government or court-based roles- do not control the physical spaces in which they meet clients. That reality does not prevent meaningful change.

When the room cannot be altered, process can. Beginning interactions with grounding statements, setting expectations clearly at the outset, slowing the pace intentionally and building in short pauses or micro-breaks can all reduce cognitive load. Simple phrases such as “Let’s slow this down for a moment” can interrupt escalation and restore focus.

Predictability as a calming process

Predictability is inherently calming, especially for neurodiverse clients. Using the same meeting structure each time, following a consistent order of topics, and clearly signalling beginnings and endings all help reduce anxiety. Even when the content is stressful, consistency in process allows clients to orient themselves and engage more effectively.

Calm supports lawyers too

These adjustments do not only benefit clients. Calm environments and predictable processes also support lawyers, particularly in high-volume, high-stress settings such as Court buildings. When spaces are designed to reduce tension rather than amplify it, difficult conversations become easier to hold and professional fatigue is lessened.

Designing for calm is not about lowering standards or avoiding difficult issues. It is about creating the conditions in which complex, emotionally charged legal work can be done well.

Once structure, language and environment are aligned to support regulation, practitioners are in a far stronger position to consider how these principles apply in advocacy, court and mediation- contexts where stress, power and pace are heightened.

When clients thrive, so do we

Much of what has been explored here- structure, language, environment and process- can sound technical when listed out. In practice, it is about something more enduring: sustainability.

Legal practice operates within an inherent power imbalance. Clients enter a system they do not understand. Lawyers hold procedural fluency, strategic knowledge and system access. When vulnerability meets asymmetry, trust becomes the stabilising force. Structure, clarity and explicit boundaries are not merely communication techniques, they are trust-building mechanisms in an uneven landscape.

Legal practitioners, solicitors particularly, often work at the sharpest edges of the system. Day to day, the work involves layered complexity- trauma, neurodivergence, language barriers, urgency and risk- often within systems that are not designed to flex easily. There is frequently an unspoken expectation that practitioners will absorb this complexity without much adjustment in how the work itself is structured. When the work feels heavy, that is not a personal failure; it is a reflection of how demanding the work genuinely is.

Many of the interactions that drain lawyers most are not difficult because of the law, but because of misalignment. The client’s needs do not match the way the system or the practitioner within it is set up to respond. When that happens, frustration builds on both sides. By contrast, when practice is adapted thoughtfully, lawyers often see fewer misunderstandings, fewer escalations and fewer moments of wondering why something feels harder than it should.

This is where wellbeing enters the picture, without slogans or platitudes. Lawyer wellbeing is not simply about resilience or coping better. It is about reducing unnecessary stress. Each time a client understands what is happening, a meeting feels calmer, or a process becomes clearer, the emotional load carried by the practitioner reduces as well. That is not self-care; it is systems thinking.

Importantly, none of this requires doing more. The work remains the same: giving legal advice, managing risk, advocating strongly and operating within real constraints. What changes is the lens. When legal practice is designed with an understanding of how people actually process stress and information, the work becomes more effective for clients and more sustainable for those doing it.

There is no need to overhaul an entire practice to see a difference. One small shift, a different phrase, a clearer structure, a moment of flexibility, can change the trajectory of an interaction. That is true for clients, and it is true for lawyers.

The law may be the same for everyone, but the way people experience it is not. Adapting legal practice to meet people where they are does not weaken the system; it strengthens it. In doing so, it helps ensure that this work, which matters deeply, can continue to be done well, and for the long term.

Strategic empathy is not sentiment. It is a competitive and ethical advantage in complex legal work.

Same law. Different lens. Small shifts. Real impact.

After completing this article, I shared it with Adam and sought his permission to reference aspects of his experience. I want to particularly acknowledge his coining of the phrase ‘Structured Empathy’ at the heart of this piece.  His reflection reminded me that trust, not efficiency, is what stabilises people in vulnerable moments. I am grateful for his patience as a client, his willingness to share his lived insight, and the collaborative spirit that has shaped both this article and the work behind it.

If this article resonated with you or your team, the full “Same Law, Different Lens” presentation expands these ideas into a practical, interactive workshop designed for lawyers working at the frontline of complex matters. Participants leave with concrete tools they can implement immediately to improve client engagement, reduce escalation and support sustainable practice.

To enquire about booking this session for your conference, CPD program or in-house training, please get in touch.

About the Author

Clarissa Rayward is an Accredited Specialist in Family Law and Director of Brisbane Family Law Centre. She is also the founder of Happy Lawyer Happy Life, where she works with lawyers across Australia to design practices that are sustainable, humane and commercially sound. Clarissa regularly presents on collaborative practice, lawyer wellbeing and innovative legal systems design.

The quiet pricing shift happening in modern law firms

The quiet pricing shift happening in modern law firms.

There’s a quiet conversation happening in a lot of law firms right now, and it usually sounds something like this:

We’re busy… but it still feels hard.”

Hard to predict revenue. 
Hard to explain costs to clients.
 Hard to feel like the hours worked actually match the value delivered.

For many of us, this tension comes back to one thing: how we price our work.

The billable hour is familiar, but familiarity doesn’t always mean it’s serving us well. Over time it can create a subtle pressure,  every six minutes tracked, every matter slightly uncertain, every client conversation carrying a little bit of pricing anxiety.

What I’ve learned (both in my own firm and working with hundreds of lawyers) is that fixed and value pricing isn’t really about changing your numbers, it’s about changing your lens.

When you stop asking:

“How long will this take?”

and start asking:

“What outcome am I helping this client achieve?”

… everything begins to shift.

You start designing clearer services.
 Clients understand what they’re buying. 
Teams deliver with more confidence.
 And profitability becomes less tied to individual capacity.

Here’s a simple exercise you can try this week:

Pick one matter type you do often and ask yourself:

What are the predictable stages?
Where do clients usually feel uncertainty?
What would clarity look like from their perspective?

You don’t need to redesign your whole firm overnight. Sometimes the move towards fixed pricing starts with one well-defined service.

Because the truth is, pricing differently isn’t about being brave. It’s about being intentional.

If this conversation is resonating, I’m running a new masterclass:

Escape the Hourly Trap: Fixed & Value Pricing Made Simple

It’s practical, grounded, and designed to help you understand the foundations of pricing that actually works in real law firms, not just in theory.

You’ll walk away with frameworks you can apply immediately, whether you’re just exploring fixed fees or already experimenting with them.

 

I’d love to see you there.


Clarissa

P.S. If you’ve ever thought, “There must be a better way to do this,” you’re exactly who this session is for.

A Mastermind Success Story with Cara Austen

This is an image of lawyer Cara Austen

A Mastermind Success Story with Cara Austen

This is an image of lawyer Cara Austen

Since 2019, I have been hanging out with 10 amazing lawyers in a yearly Mastermind program. 10 months, 4 workshops, private coaching and a whole lot of stuff getting done.

Cara was a part of the first Mastermind program in 2019. These are her experiences and successes. 

1. Please tell us a bit about your Mastermind journey... (Where you started, the bits in between and where you are one year later? p.p1 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 15.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000} span.s1 {font-kerning: none}

One year later! On the road to the Retreat to do some more work on my #bestlawlife and spend quality time with some amazing people who get me. Last year I was already in the midst of changes: undergoing IVF and working out how to successfully transition leadership of my corporate legal team. I was also working out how to move from being in a fairly senior corporate role to running my own business – I had ideas but at the same time I had no idea! 

This year has been largely one of learning, trying things and being inspired. 

I have learnt technical skills for running my own business. Many of these skills have come from conversations with the other Masterminders, usually just evolving organically so I end up learning things I never knew would be useful from people with real lives experience. 

I have tried things I never thought I would. I’ve built my own website, created a suite of “how to” guides, written articles based on interviews with people in my target industry and I’ve collaborated with real humans to host an industry event. by doing these things I’m now closer to doing what I am really passionate about.  

I’ve been so inspired by the other Masterminders. They have all given so freely to help me and each other, and have also given a great big friendly push when needed. There is no ego and no bullshit.  

A year later and I’m feeling so much more grounded and certain than I did when the Mastermind started. During the year I was also going through a much wanted IVF pregnancy and all the stress that entails. The Mastermind literally kept me sane as I struggled to work out what to do with my career, while not wanting to over commit myself, while also being very scared of missing out if I didn’t do EVERYTHING the world tells you you need to do to #beaboss and #hustle. I’ve not really learnt to balance, but I know that I’ve learnt so much this year that when I’m ready to really hit the go button on the business side of things I will be so ready and will have the most amazing  team of cheerleaders backing me. 

2. What are you deeply proud of achieving or doing this year?
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Working out what I like to do, need to do and what I don’t want to do. 

3. What is your 2019 highlight?

Personally it was the birth of my child, Ellis. 

4. Your Mastermind experience in a word?

Genuine.

I have enjoyed working with lots of great lawyers over the past few years doing 1 on 1 coaching, which is something I will continue to do, but I know myself, there is something to be said for being in a group when it comes to really getting stuff done!

And so, for 2022 I am again rolling out my 10 person Mastermind and if you think that is something for you, I would love to have you join me.

I have come to learn that one of my super powers is the ability to ‘kindly’ push people off virtual cliffs by giving them the confidence (and the tools!) to achieve their goals and the Mastermind in 2022 will do that and more.

To hear more from Cara and the Mastermind class of 2019 you can tune into my short video below. 

This is an image of the Mastermind rainbow and logo.

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How to ‘show up’ on your off days by Samara Wendt

This is an image of a law student with her funky notebook by the pool.

How to ‘show up’ on your days off!

Author Samara Wendt

In my life, there aren’t too many opportunities for days off. Even so,  I simply love Samara’s tips for how to get the most out of your down time. These tools may seem basic (I mean brushing your teeth shouldn’t take too much prompting) but when we are being pulled this way and that by family, work, or this crazy holiday season, it is so important to remind ourselves to ‘show up’ for our ‘off’ days so that we can keep nailing it on our ‘on’ days. 

Clarissa

Some days you make magic, and other days getting out of bed is an achievement. Here are the small self-care wins that always help you ‘show up’ and make yourself proud.

Practice Gratitude.

My practice of gratitude is quite flimsy. While I do not actively prioritise the practice every day, as my day travels on I acknowledge great things like that first sip of hot bean juice (coffee for those playing at home), how the sun feels on my skin, and how great it is to see with my glasses on! The moment I realise I am having an off day I sit myself down with a note book and affirmation book. Here I list three things I am thankful for. These are usually constant things in my everyday life. Following this I open my affirmation book and write out the first affirmation my eyes land on – I imagine I see what I meant to see in that moment. Through the day I will repeat this affirmation to myself, focusing my thoughts on it especially during trying moments. Mindfulness works differently for everyone and I urge you to give it a go.

Brush Your Teeth.

You know what I am talking about. Yes, you can be bothered.

Pack Your Bag The Night Before.

The best way to support your future self is to pack your bag each night. Just spend 5 minutes packing essentials for the next day and you are almost guaranteed to not forget anything. This includes putting your glasses into the case before packing the case and plugging your laptop in to charge. Regardless of how your morning begins, your bag is ready, and you have prepared yourself to ‘show up’ to the tasks of the day. Please note that ‘packing’ can include throwing items in the general direction of your bag.

Drink A Glass Of Water.

Then drink another. Every day can be a struggle to drink enough water. So, when you feel yourself getting too deep in your thoughts, have a glass of water. This is serious self-care in more ways than one – hydration and distraction. On that note, make sure you are making a conscious effort to eat.

Silence Your Phone.

It may not be practical to silence your phone for the entire day due to work requirements. But take intervals throughout the day to flick it on silent and completely focus on doing one task. Even just eating lunch uninterrupted. Once you are on a role with that task your mind will fade from notifications. Call it a mini-detox!

Finish Work On Time.

Remember not everyday is about making magic. Finish work when you are suppose to. And do not take any work home!

Exercise.

It has been sufficiently proven that movement positively affects mood. Whatever your preferred style of exercise is make it a top priority on these kinds of days. It really does not need to be high impact and sweaty. A gentle walk or yoga stretches will do wonders for your mind and body.

Sleep.

Head to bed at a reasonable time. Before you do, pack your bag, have a glass of water and brush your teeth.

Making it through an off day is called ‘showing up’ for YOURSELF! Today was not about making magic, it was about preserving your energy for tomorrow’s magic. 

Share your self-care essentials with me on LINKEDIN and INSTAGRAM

 

 

Samara Wendt

Blogger and Happy Law Student 

Oh hey there!

My name is Samara. I am a student, volunteer and kindness advocate doing my best to overcome the #lawlife imposter syndrome. Currently, I am studying Law (Honours) at Queensland University of Technology. 

Did you have a light-bulb moment when choosing to study law? Because I certainly did not! After witnessing the extent of injustice around me, I simply wanted to help those suffering vulnerability. This is where law made sense for me.

You will quickly come to learn about the love-hate relationship I have with imposter syndrome. This is as it does continues to teach me so much about myself, including how to still conquering life in a variety of roles. 

Join the journey with me here on the Happy Lawyer Happy Life Student Blog, on Instagram and Linkedin

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The Retreat 2019 Dyan Burgess— Design thinking or MVP: Call it what you want – let’s get creative!

Design Thinking or MVP: Call it what you want- let’s get creative!

Dyan Burgess

This is an image of Dyan Burgess

As you may already know Dyan is amazing at visual note taking so instead of a ‘written’ blog post here is a ‘visual’ blog post of the framework Dyan shared with us at the Retreat!!

Dyan's Magic Formula
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Dyan shared with us that every project she tackles, no matter big or small, Dyan takes the same approach each and every time. Dyan went on to explain to us that her magic formula follows six simple steps and assures us that it will be the fool proof answer to all our project planning and needs.

This is an image of Dyan Burgess Visual Notes

Step one: You’ve Got Your Idea

Dyan tells us that every idea that we may come across should be tested using her magic formula. At this step, you might have a wish list longer than your arm, but remember each and every idea deserves a shot. 

Step two: The Domino Test

 

This is an image of dominos

Dyan tells us to always start from the beginning. Dyan reminds us that just like dominos, an idea will trigger a series of other ideas to fall in line just like a domino. However, Dyan warns, that you must start at the beginning and we never start our domino test half way along, this is to ensure we have maximum impact throughout our planning process. 

Step Three: The Before Action Review 

Dyan stresses careful planning, visualisation, and review before starting any project. Here, you get started on imagining all the different things you might face on your planning journey and really look at locking down what you hope your idea will look like. Dyan tells us that by visualising ahead of time what we might come across during our planning journey, we’re better suited to face anything that comes our way. 

Step Four: Project Outline 

Here is where we map out and then action our idea. Dyan uses the example of a flow chart to help us do so. 

Step Five: The After-Action Review 

Here it’s time for a debrief. Go over absolutely everything that you’ve faced on your project journey and talk, talk, talk about all you came across along the way. 

Step Six: Update Checklists

Here is where you make a contingency plan for next time, keep all of your notes about what was faced along the way and update any resources or precedents you might have to help you along the way next time you tackle this same feat. 

Thank you to our partners for helping us bring The Retreat 2019 (a law conference like no other!) to you!

PLATINUM PARTNER

Our platinum partner Automio are thrilled to a part of the Club Retreat 2019. If you have been wanting to find out more about Automio’s combination of legal automation software and world-class training to scale your law firm to 7 figures you can book in a demo session with Business Development Manager, Mike Mullins here.

Automio love working with entrepreneurial lawyers just like you to help you scale up your law firm. And the final ‘Automio bedazzle’ we have for you is a special offer for you on Automio’s ‘Scale Up Springboard Training Program.’ 

If you enrol in Scale Up by 5pm AEDT 12 November you will get these fabulous free bonuses:

– A new, high-converting law firm website OR have our fabulous copywriter write high-converting copy for your firm’s website. 

 – A bonus small group VIP Event with Claudia King in Sydney before the 2 day Intensive. 

 – Up to $500 off your travel to the Sydney Intensive paid for

You can learn more about this offer at the Automio booth!

The Retreat 2019 Jacob Aldridge – Everything I Learnt, I Learnt from Cinema: Lessons from the World’s Greatest Cinephile!

Everything I Learnt, I Learnt from Cinema. Lessons from the World’s Greatest Cinephile.

Jacob Aldridge

Author Kiarah Grace Kelly

For the final session of the Retreat 2019 (can you BELIEVE we’re done for another year?), we were in the presence of greatness. Now- international business coach, new father, inspirational club faculty member or not, Jacob is a world record holder. Yes, in June 2003, Jacob was crowned the world record holder of the longest movie marathon ever. From Saturday to Tuesday, Jacob sat and he watched. It’s important to note, his movie marathon was more of a marathon than any athletic feat. What’s a few hours of running, anyway? Jacob’s task took days! Jacob remembered the moments in his life that matter- the birth of his daughter who was so very, very wanted, his wedding day and the memorable first kiss, and some moments of learning from his movie marathon too. Here’s what Jacob has to say, told through the movies- 

Harry Potter
  1. Harry teaches us to choose greatness, choose magnificence and to create your whole reality. 
  2. Harry Potter shows us like not many others could, that you can have life happen to you, or have life come through you. 
the Breakfast Club
  1. The Breakfast Club taught Mr Murray that we see people as we want to see people, no matter who they really are;
  2. You can be a Brain, an Athlete, a Basket Case, a Princess and a Criminal. Jacob reminded us that far too often we’re told we have to specialise, that we have to take away the parts of us that don’t fit into ‘the box’;
  3. You have permission to explore, to go where you might not usually. Chase your wildest dreams and ask all the questions. 
Star Wars: A New Hope
  1. Star Wars fans know it pays to be human, no matter what the gang come up against, humanness triumphs;
  2. If we follow the idea that we can get 80% of the outcome from 20% of the input, we can get 50% with just 1% input. In Star Wars land, we learn that it’s all about knowing your 1%, which part of the Death Star to strike;
  3. Go with the force. The Star Wars crew will always have their strategy, their goal. But, it is the force, the systems, that make it count. 
Glengarry Glen Ross
  1. Despite Alec’s greatness, this is a lesson on what not to do. Glengarry Glen Ross teaches us that the hard sales tactics still exist- 3rd prize is never ‘you’re fired’;
  2. Know your numbers, know them well. More importantly, it’s the conversation that flows after the numbers that counts. If a member of your team is underperforming, what do they need to improve?;
  3. If you ever do need to have that difficult ‘do better’ conversation, it’ll change you as a leader for the better, you’ll know what you need to do to never have to have that conversation again. 
Breakfast at Tiffany's
  1. Champagne before breakfast is a ‘sometimes’ activity;
  2. There’s not much to find at Tiffany’s for under $10;
  3. Spend your days doing things you’ve never done before- whether they take place on the streets of New York with a very handsome author as your date is another story.
the Lion King
  1. Never stand downwind of Pumba;
  2. You know this one: it’s a problem free philosophy, it means no worries for the rest of your days! No but really, Jacob reminded us that between action and reaction we always have choice, so choose not to worry.
It's a Wonderful Life

This one is up to you- you have choice. What makes a wonderful life? 

Over the course of the Retreat, we’ve had a lot of lessons, we’ve got new energy and there’s been so much excitement. Maybe we’re leaving a little fearful of the choices we have ahead. Jacob reminds us we do have the choice, if the wrong choice does arise, just like a movie, we can choose to pause, turn it off, and we won’t choose it again. 

I can’t help but to feel Jacob was the perfect choice to send us off and close out all our Retreat learnings for another year. With his usual wisdom and epic delivery, I just loved Jacob’s presentation today. 

Thank you to our partners for helping us bring The Retreat 2019 (a law conference like no other!) to you!

PLATINUM PARTNER

Our platinum partner Automio are thrilled to a part of the Club Retreat 2019. If you have been wanting to find out more about Automio’s combination of legal automation software and world-class training to scale your law firm to 7 figures you can book in a demo session with Business Development Manager, Mike Mullins here.

Automio love working with entrepreneurial lawyers just like you to help you scale up your law firm. And the final ‘Automio bedazzle’ we have for you is a special offer for you on Automio’s ‘Scale Up Springboard Training Program.’ 

If you enrol in Scale Up by 5pm AEDT 12 November you will get these fabulous free bonuses:

– A new, high-converting law firm website OR have our fabulous copywriter write high-converting copy for your firm’s website. 

 – A bonus small group VIP Event with Claudia King in Sydney before the 2 day Intensive. 

 – Up to $500 off your travel to the Sydney Intensive paid for

You can learn more about this offer at the Automio booth!

Kiarah Grace Kelly

Kiarah Grace Kelly

Blogger and Happy Lawyer

Hi! I am Kiarah Grace Kelly, I have just finished a dual Bachelors degree in Law and Government and International Relations at Griffith University on the Gold Coast. I tested my legal toes in the water at a boutique Gold Coast law firm before starting as a Law Graduate at Brisbane Family Law Centre in November 2018. I’ve just been admitted here in Queensland which makes me a Brand New Lawyer or #babylawyer as the BFLC gang likes to say. My sole practice area is Family Law.

I’m looking forward to writing about and sharing with you all that I can at this crazy-exciting but daunting stage of my career. I think there’s a need to talk about our experiences as early career lawyers so that we can all lean on each other as much as we can.

I would love to connect with you on Linkedin and Instagram!

The Retreat 2019 Katherine Maslen – Do It Now: You Have Everything Inside Of You To Make That Shift & Make It Now

Do It Now! You Have Everything Inside of You to Make that Shift & Make It Now

Katherine Maslen

Author: Hannah Trotter

Our resident naturopath, author and natural health expert, Katherine Maslen, shares on health goals, why they are so hard to achieve, and how we can start reaching them.

What's Your View on Health?

Do you value it? Is it a chore? What does good health mean to you? 

Health impacts every area of our lives but it’s more than diets and exercise – it’s about being happy and content, knowing who you are, being comfortable with yourself, and being happy with where you are at. 

 

Why Are Health Goals So Hard to Achieve?

Making health goals are easy, the trouble comes with seeing them through. 

Why is it so hard?

So often, we make excuses when it comes to seeing our health goals through. 

The most common excuses:

  1. Time – “I’m too busy!”
  2. Money – “I can’t afford it!”
  3. Knowledge – “I don’t know how!”
These excuses so quickly become ‘I can’t!’ So let’s take a closer look at these excuses. 
  1. Time – Does the time not exist? Or do you value other things more?
  2. Money – Do you not value it enough to pay for it? 
  3. Knowledge – Do you know how to find out? 

The reality is, it’s not that we ‘”can’t” it’s that we “won’t”. 

Katherine says it’s okay not to want to – we just have to be conscious and aware if it’s not a priority. When health isn’t a priority, but we tell ourselves it is, that’s when we start to feel failures.

 

What Drives Us?

We are driven by 3 key factors: 

  1. Our Values – we are living our highest values right now. If we value health, we will be driven to achieve our health goals. On the other hand, if we don’t value health, our motivation to persist and commit to our goals waivers until we give up and say we can’t.
  2. Our Beliefs – Only 5% of what’s going on in our brains is conscious. This means, if it’s not something we subconsciously want, health will quickly move down the priority list. 
  3. Our Mindset – it’s easy to go over our negative thoughts and not nearly as easy to play out the positive. If we tell ourselves we can’t be healthy, that triggers an emotion, and goes on to trigger a behaviour. Chances are if you think you can’t achieve your health goal, you won’t try very hard to prove you can. 

How To Best Set Yourself Up To Achieve Your Health Goal

Katherine helpfully gave us 5 tips to setting ourselves up with the best chance of achieving our health goals. 

  1. Be Clear – Write it down, understand it, don’t complicate it!
  2. Be Real – Be honest with yourself. Life isn’t perfect and you don’t need to be – be aware of where you’re at and work from there. 
  3. Plan it – to succeed at anything, you need a plan. Not a plan for achieving it just this week, but what you need to put in place to achieve it in the long term.
  4. Visualise it! It’s not about visualising the end result, think of the journey and imagine yourself taking the steps to get there. 
  5. Support – don’t do it alone! If things get hard, have someone you can fall back on who will encourage you to continue and do the same for them. We thrive in community. 

The Take Home

The ultimate thing I took from Katherine today is that we do and prioritise the things we value. It’s so important to be self-aware to know whether you value the goals you set enough to achieve them. That way you can accurately understand why you’re not achieving those goals – it’s not because you can’t and it’s not because you’re a failure . 

Thank you to our partners for helping us bring The Retreat 2019 (a law conference like no other!) to you!

THIS SESSION WAS SPONSORED BY

Bronwyn and Belinda, two of the #radboss ladies from Lacuna Legal Providers will be with us over the 2 days at the Retreat. Now these ladies are cleaver- they provide ‘back of house support to solo and small law firms aka YOU!!

Lacuna Legal Providers have a special offer for all attendees of the Club Retreat 2019 to sign up for a practice management or BD profile check in at 2 hours for the price of 1! At the end of the session you will get 10 tips on how you can improve your practice. More details will be shared on the flyer at the Retreat.

PLATINUM PARTNER

Our platinum partner Automio are thrilled to a part of the Club Retreat 2019. If you have been wanting to find out more about Automio’s combination of legal automation software and world-class training to scale your law firm to 7 figures you can book in a demo session with Business Development Manager, Mike Mullins here.

Automio love working with entrepreneurial lawyers just like you to help you scale up your law firm. And the final ‘Automio bedazzle’ we have for you is a special offer for you on Automio’s ‘Scale Up Springboard Training Program.’ 

If you enrol in Scale Up by 5pm AEDT 12 November you will get these fabulous free bonuses:

– A new, high-converting law firm website OR have our fabulous copywriter write high-converting copy for your firm’s website. 

 – A bonus small group VIP Event with Claudia King in Sydney before the 2 day Intensive. 

 – Up to $500 off your travel to the Sydney Intensive paid for

You can learn more about this offer at the Automio booth!

Hannah Trotter

Hannah Trotter

Blogger and Happy Law Student 

Hi there! I’m Hannah and I am a law student currently in my third year at Queensland University of Technology. I graduated high-school in 2014 completely clueless about who I was, what I wanted and how I intended to get there. To many people’s surprise (including my own) I moved from my family farm on the Sunshine Coast to Brisbane to start my law degree in 2016.

Following my first year I commenced work as the Receptionist at Brisbane Family Law Centre. Having worked with this amazing team for nearly 2 years, I have been given a learning opportunity that goes beyond lectures and tutorials by providing a practical experience of the world of Law. My experience as part of the BFLC team has taught me that a Law career does not have to fit into a traditional box which has ignited a new passion for my studies as well as my future career in the legal profession.

In the meantime, I’ll stick to writing musicals, drinking coffee and playing board games.

I would love to connect with you on Linkedin and Instagram!

The Retreat 2019 Lucy Dickens – Productise & Profit

Productise & Profit: How to simplify your business so you can do work you love.

Lucy Dickens

This an image of Lucy Dickens

Author Kiarah Grace Kelly

Lucy Dickens is the queen of all things productising. Lucy sees the world differently to many; in Lucy’s world there’s no legal product that can’t be productised. Lucy Dickens hails from Perth and graces the halls of city firm Birman & Ride by day. It is at Birman & Ride where Lucy has built and built and built. Birman & Ride now points so heavily to its inner productised businesses every day and Lucy has been such a huge part of that.

In opening her presentation, Lucy asked of us- why are we all here today? Lucy posed that there was something bigger bringing us all together, she suggested that was our collective care for meaning. Lucy goes on to explain how to get from productised services right to your meaning.

But, Why?

Productised services will allow us to simplify our businesses, we’ll go from selling time to selling solutions. 

It’s productised services that will allow us to penetrate our potential client’s scarcity mindset in a buyers market. Why? Lucy tells us that the drivers of selection when potential clients are choosing between us all are; the benefits to them, our communication with them, whether they perceive any hassle for them ahead and, in fourth place, price.

What is a Productised Service?

Productised services are packaged, sold and delivered. They are made up of deliverables and outcomes. They are always fixed price and fixed scope. Productised services position you as the expert. 

The magic of the productised service is that it is tangible, Lucy told us how it’s always easier to say yes to something you can see. When you can deliver someone something, you delight them. 

Keys to Success

So what are Lucy’s ‘must-dos’ when it comes to the productised service? Here’s the situation-

  1. Keep your ideal client at the centre of everything while you build, but also while you deliver;
  2. Sell what your client’s want, not what you want to sell;
  3. Remember that the solutions your ideal clients want, are bigger than law;
  4. To get from customer to solution, you need systems;
  5. Once you’ve got it, cross sell with it!

The Journey

Lucy took us through her productisation ladder, where do you fit? 

  • the traditional practice – you sell your expertise according to time, you tell, tell and tell again what your skills are and your client finds it difficult to know what they can do with them;
  • you sell packages – you’ve got the ingredients and you tell your client’s what you can do. But there’s no method;
  • the specialist – you know your knowledge is worth more than your time. You’ve got the packages and you’re value priced;
  • you’re productised – you take your clients from problem to promise. They get the product that they’ve been waiting for and you made it happen;
  • you have a product ecosystem – you’ve got many products, they’re automated. You’re spending the time you’ve saved by automating meaningfully. Plus, you get to choose the parts of the products process you get involved in!

Parting Words

Lucy left us by giving us a challenge- be more like a haiku (simple, elegant, full of meaning). 

If you’re looking for more, Lucy has written an e-book(!) all about this topic and you can get it at lucydickens.com.au. Lucy is happy to take questions at lucy@lucydickens.com.au.

Thank you to our partners for helping us bring The Retreat 2019 (a law conference like no other!) to you!

THIS SESSION WAS SPONSORED BY

Bronwyn and Belinda, two of the #radboss ladies from Lacuna Legal Providers will be with us over the 2 days at the Retreat. Now these ladies are cleaver- they provide ‘back of house support to solo and small law firms aka YOU!!

Lacuna Legal Providers have a special offer for all attendees of the Club Retreat 2019 to sign up for a practice management or BD profile check in at 2 hours for the price of 1! At the end of the session you will get 10 tips on how you can improve your practice. More details will be shared on the flyer at the Retreat.

PLATINUM PARTNER

Our platinum partner Automio are thrilled to a part of the Club Retreat 2019. If you have been wanting to find out more about Automio’s combination of legal automation software and world-class training to scale your law firm to 7 figures you can book in a demo session with Business Development Manager, Mike Mullins here.

Automio love working with entrepreneurial lawyers just like you to help you scale up your law firm. And the final ‘Automio bedazzle’ we have for you is a special offer for you on Automio’s ‘Scale Up Springboard Training Program.’ 

If you enrol in Scale Up by 5pm AEDT 12 November you will get these fabulous free bonuses:

– A new, high-converting law firm website OR have our fabulous copywriter write high-converting copy for your firm’s website. 

 – A bonus small group VIP Event with Claudia King in Sydney before the 2 day Intensive. 

 – Up to $500 off your travel to the Sydney Intensive paid for

You can learn more about this offer at the Automio booth!

Kiarah Grace Kelly

Kiarah Grace Kelly

Blogger and Happy Lawyer

Hi! I am Kiarah Grace Kelly, I have just finished a dual Bachelors degree in Law and Government and International Relations at Griffith University on the Gold Coast. I tested my legal toes in the water at a boutique Gold Coast law firm before starting as a Law Graduate at Brisbane Family Law Centre in November 2018. I’ve just been admitted here in Queensland which makes me a Brand New Lawyer or #babylawyer as the BFLC gang likes to say. My sole practice area is Family Law.

I’m looking forward to writing about and sharing with you all that I can at this crazy-exciting but daunting stage of my career. I think there’s a need to talk about our experiences as early career lawyers so that we can all lean on each other as much as we can.

I would love to connect with you on Linkedin and Instagram!